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The Guest List
A guest list consists of family and friends that
- suits the size of your ceremony and reception sites
- corresponds with the level of intimacy desired for the wedding
- can be accommodated within your wedding budget.
Traditionally the bride and groom's families are each allotted half of the desired total guest count. Start by combining the lists from the bride, groom, bride’s parents, and the groom’s parents. It is necessary that everyone make up their lists realistically. Remove duplicates and prioritize each list. These lists may be modified somewhat as acceptances and regrets are know.
Must Be Invited
- The spouse, fiancé, or live-in partner of each invited guest, even if you've never met
- The person who performs the ceremony, and his or her spouse
- The parents of ring bearers and flower girls
Nice to Include
- The parents of the bridesmaids. It’s a nice gesture when feasible, especially when the bride knows them well.
Not Necessary, but Meaningful, to Include
- Counselors, advisers, or mentors to the bride or groom who are not close friends but who have been an important part of their lives.
Inviting Children
Inviting children to your wedding is a personal decision. Your budget and the size of your reception site may also play a role in the decision. Including children in your wedding guest list is not necessary but you may need to talk with some friends to explain that no children or children under a certain age will not be invited. Handling these matters with sensitivity is important to your guests.
Who to Invite to a Destination Wedding
It’s more difficult for people to attend a destination wedding, so your guest list will likely be limited to immediate family and closest friends. Even then, some may not be able to attend. Talk with family and friends in advance if possible to avoid embarrassing financial or timing/vacation time issues of receiving an unexpected invitation.
Guest List to a Reaffirmation
Some couples prefer to limit the guest list at the ceremony and reception to close family and friends and to enjoy a later, larger get-together. Keeping the guest list short is considerate of guests who may have attended (and purchased a gift for) your first wedding. Other couples plan the large and elaborate celebration they've always dreamed of and didn't have the first time. As a general guideline, invite those you couldn't imagine getting married without. You also may have a lovely reaffirmation and request that guest not bring gifts.
How Many Regrets to Expect
Be prepared. Wedding industry experts predict that 15 to 20 percent of invited guests send regrets. That means if you are planning to have 150 guests, invite 170 to 180 people. (Some people are more comfortable estimating a 10 percent margin for regre | 
